Poetry,  Writing

Rock Bottom & How to Avoid it

I’m convinced of a fifth dimension. 
It’s not a dramatic thing, not like the movies. 

There’s no flash of light, no distorting of the senses. 
No loud noises, no clap of thunder.
No brilliant colour, or intertwining of perception.

Just a slip of the mind,
A true acknowledgement.

For it’s woven in the quietness.
Nothing you do will make it more prominent. 
It’s quite the opposite. That’s how it works.

A reset
A flow. 
A glint in the eye of a bird,
A whisper of a breeze underneath a willow tree
In order to see it, you need to be still.

It’s a gift, one we’ve all been given. 
There for the taking 
A hidden treasure so dear we could never repay,
From someone you may never know, though I pray that you do

Like snow in a wardrobe,
sometimes, you may not even know you’re looking for it. 

You are known.
Every fibre, every hair, every thought, designed.
Every decision, every desire, every dream.
Crafted, and set on a path
That you can choose not to follow. 
For love is about choice.

The path feels like peace.
Like stretching out in long grass on a summer’s day,
As if a warm current is lifting you from the cold depths of rock bottom
As if all you were made to do is be.

Why is it that this peace seems to go against all of what our world demands?
No need for hurry,
no need for expectations,
no need for hate,
no need for money,
no need for anything except for love.
Why should life demand anything more?

Why are we so caught up in everything else?
Why are we wired this way?
Why do we push so hard against how the codes of our souls were created?
And why do we unintentionally separate ourselves from what brings us peace within our soul?

Hurt?
Pain?
Loneliness?
Reliance on our own ideas and perceptions, freeing us to clash upon those of others. 
We hate the idea of a firm truth. 

Because that means addressing who we are in this life.
We’re people that hurt, people that cause pain, people that rely on our own ideas and perceptions. 

We’d rather suffer unknowingly in our actions, than face what we do to others. 

Maybe that’s the way it has to be, in this life at least.
Maybe that’s what makes the subliminal so special. 
That space in between the demands of everything else. 
The Word, the history, the stories and The Gift.

Even if just for a second, 
Underneath all the lies, the harm I’ve brought to others, the way that I subconsciously choose to live my life
Even though I am human and I am guilty

He reminds me,
I am who I was created to be.

2 Comments

  • Grandad

    Dearest Emma,

    Today in Nelson is a foul rainy Sunday with a great big low plonked right on top of the South Island. So here I am sitting in front of the fire and taking the time to catch up with your blog. Also looking forward to a chat with mum and dad and Jonathan this evening. They will be in Auckland, the night before leaving for USA and to see you!! Yippee! How exciting.

    Annika and I have just read together your poem, ‘Rock Bottom and how to Avoid It’ . We are stunned at the wisdom and insightfulness you have shown in this writing. There are lines that are profound. ‘We hate the idea of a firm truth’ makes me think a lot about the American friends you are working with, most of whom in a month or so will be voting in a political environment where it would seem there is no such thing as a ‘firm truth’. It is a bewildering landscape where their decisions will change the fate of the world. Annika and I smiled at ‘Like snow in a wardrobe’ -that’s a secret line only for those who know Peter, Susan, Edmund and Lucy and the adventures they had through the wardrobe in Narnia. As you know, I read stories to Annika out loud. We have recently finished (for the second time) all 32 books of the Disk World series (Terry Pratchett) Takes 3 years to get through them! We have decided to take a break and read all of Narnia again. (up to #3 today – Prince Caspian)

    I also am convinced of a ‘fifth dimension’. Being 75 makes you think about heaven a lot, and where it is! (Thats a bit heavy!) People ask ‘Where is your God’ and most of the time they are looking in the wrong place. Jesus said to the Pharisees, ‘The Kingdom of God’ is within you’. You say ‘In order to see it you need to be still’. Where is heaven? Well now, you will have to forgive a bit of science creeping in here, but I often think about the great dilemma for astronomy which is ‘dark matter’. There is far more gravity out there in the universe (more than 90%) than can be accounted for from the mass that can be measured. So, my take on that is heaven is right out there, right here and inside me. It is the ‘dark matter’ and is anything but dark. What I mean is that throughout the universe, God displays his majesty in all the stars and planets, but all of their greatness is only a trifle, compared to the ‘fifth dimension’ which is the glory and greatness of heaven, which is everywhere. (‘in God we live and move and have our being’). And because of what Jesus has done for us, we can embrace that glory and have the kingdom of Heaven inside us. Pardon the heavy moment again but for me, dying will be just to slip sideways into that fifth dimension, and see it for what it really is.

    Phew. That’s all a bit serious. You are having such a wonderful adventure at the moment and I am sorry that the horse ‘wrangling’ has not eventuated quite as you liked. If that is the worst thing that happen in your adventures you will be very fortunate. Weren’t the auroras amazing! We did not get to se it here in Nelson. Your photos are wonderful. We look forward to you meeting mum and dad and want a stunning picture of you (spoiler alert!) wearing the gift we have given you (coming with mum) for your 21st. Definitely time to replace the high school pic of you on the family portrait wall in the living room!

    We think of you often and love the work you put into your blog!

    Much love,

    Grandad.

    • Em

      I love hearing from you Grandad, this made me tear up! So glad you enjoyed reading it. I love your ideas on it, that’s exactly what I was trying to get across. I’m so glad you picked up on the Narnia reference, it’s still a favourite of mine and will be for my lifetime. Biggest hugs, Emma

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